naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
