I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
