Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
