Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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