my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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