So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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