Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
