Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Randomize