i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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