They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Randomize
