Rock
Scissors
Fuck
somebody snuck up and got me drunk
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
