I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
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