I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize