Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
