He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
vagina is talking i cant
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
