is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Randomize
