I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
God, you're like boner-b-gone
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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