Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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