Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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