I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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