nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
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