I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize
