Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
