Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize
