My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
I didn't notice because vodka
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
false alarm, still single
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize