I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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