You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Randomize
