Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Who wears a wallet chain?!
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Are we still banned from the library?
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
