I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
i think im in europe. pls send help
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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