After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Randomize
