No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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