even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Randomize
