Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Randomize
