yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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