he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
