Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
