I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize