Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
