Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize