Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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