**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Did you pee in the oven last night??
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
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