she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
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