I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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