i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
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