i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
