We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Randomize
