...so i touched it.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
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