I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
He? As in you personified your dick?
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
