i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
What did we do last night that was yellow?
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize