I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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